bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize