I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
