I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
