This house was built for laser tag.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
