"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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