I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
the liver wants what the liver wants
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Randomize
