Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
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