the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Say something about gay babies.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
