My sheets look like a crime scene.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
is it fun? or sober?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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