And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
