You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
