Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
