apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I think my fart just growled at me.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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