its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
