should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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