none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
