Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Randomize