Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
