I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
