Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i think i have two assholes
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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