Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
