I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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