I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
this just has baby written all over it
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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