I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize