This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
