You can't motorboat a personality
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
