He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
