ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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