That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize