HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Hippo gnu deer
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Randomize
