I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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