A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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