is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
