is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
