why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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