I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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