Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
