How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
