So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
