When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
