In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Be still, my beating vagina.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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