just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize