Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
