this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
He better not be in your backpack
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
