Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
