come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
