i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
