about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize