PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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