fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Randomize