either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Randomize
