so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
