Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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